BrentBurnedInCA
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Registered: 03-13-2009
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posted on 03-13-2009 at 12:10 |
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DONT DO IT!
I married a "model quality" woman named Irina. We were married for 7 years, with one child. I sponsored her parents for permanent resident visas. The very day that she received word from her father that they received their visas, she started cheating on me. We knew six other Russian woman / American man couples. Only one of them is still married, and she is threatening divorce. The girls all know how generous divorce settlements are, and they plan on them. They want at least one kid to assure child support payments.
Bottom line: they are from a land where morality doesn't exist. Cheating on a man is just no big deal to them. Lying is OK for them, but bad for everyone else. Double standards and refusal to accept responsibility like you have never seen. It is all about exchanging sex for a better life - nothing more.
Buyer beware!
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ken
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Registered: 10-16-2002 Location:
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posted on 04-02-2009 at 11:58 |
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I totally disagree.
On April 25th will be my 10th anniversary with my Russian wife. I know over 100 couples who have married women form Russian & then Ukraine. And only hands full are divorced now. Compare that to the national average of 50%
The determining factor is picking the right one. Most guys that have failed marriages fall in lust not love. Finding common interests is critical, finding a sole mate. Not bring home an arm trophy.
If you want a lasting relationship, make sure you enjoy each others company, interests, music and so forth. Understand each other’s goals and expectations. Know what her hopes and dreams are. Make sure she knows yours. The marriages I have seen fail I could see from day1. Use you big brain not the little one.
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sickofscammers
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Registered: 04-18-2009
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posted on 05-07-2009 at 04:01 |
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i see both sides of this
what ken says about finding the right one is an obvious answer about all women who list themselves on the internet, especially fsu countries, where scamming is out of control.
what brentburnedinca wrote is also very true, there is a lot of gold diggers out there and dishonest women on the sites.even on your sites ken!..and you would know of this..
Have a good look at the women on the loveme.com sites and if you look closely you will see only beautiful, young women who have had a professional photo shoot..and not to forget how that photo will end up being altered in some way or another..I know, when i went to visit my lady, i didn't recognize her at all, in fact, when she turned up on a date wearing the same cloths in her profile, did my suspicions relaxed and this is loveme.com she is with..Her teeth on the afa profile are perfect, perfectly altered that is, and so was her eyes made to look more alluring. A totally different woman in real life and i found out later, so was her attitude.......
Also brent, look at the bikini photos and the half naked photos, these women are all scammers, who seemed to be in search of their soul mate even if he is 30 years older then her...A lot of them on loveme.com and most of the other sites...
I was talking to my english speaking guide in Ukraine and she told me about how she was approached by marriage agencies to write letters to the men and how one of her friends works in a Nikolaev agency as a interpreter and is in serious relations with 4 different men via the agency..
here is one rule that not many men who write to these women know about:
when a woman signs up for the agency, she will receive full support and protection from all the agencies she is listed with. she will receive help with pre written and stored letters, she will receive commission from everything from letters, live chat and apartments and even taxis that she can help you with..
But the main rule is, if a man visits her in her city, she MUST make herself available..
a agency in Nikolaev approached a young women with this proposal even though the agency knew she had a local boyfriend..and that agency has a gold rating with jims agencies scams.
you right ken, it's about finding the right one...
regards
sickofscammers
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ragingbull
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Registered: 05-14-2009
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posted on 05-14-2009 at 12:28 |
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Why Not?
You have one success out of six, perhaps zero. If I was a statistician, I would say not enough data. Flip a coin six times. If you get six heads, does that mean you will get heads all the time?
Now, you have to tell us. It was all her fault, right? You were the model husband?
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sickofscammers
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Registered: 04-18-2009
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posted on 05-15-2009 at 01:41 |
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agencies good or bad?
Ragingbull.
What do you think about agencies overall?
I have read your post about Natasha Club and the problems you have experienced with that site, i have made a comment on another post on this site how 'good' agencies are affiliated with 'bad' agencies..For example, 1st. International Marriage Network will use the services of AFA for interpreting letters from their site, back to the agency where the woman is listed with her local agency..People notice a lot of scammers on 1st. International, i know i have come across quite a few, but some people say AFA is one of the best...But best at what?
Some people say socials are the go while others say you are wasting your money..
Some people say try to get the woman away from the agency, while others say if she doesn't speak English, move on..
Questions for anyone;
How many times does a man have to travel to FSU to work out a good system?
Why do men go to this trouble?
Is it worth it?
Why are men drawn to FSU women?
sickofscammers
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ragingbull
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Registered: 05-14-2009
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posted on 05-15-2009 at 17:19 |
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Agencies
The agency that my gf used is Edem Club, probably the same one that gave Natasha Club the fake profile. They also own at least one two bedroom apartment in Kiev. At first, I assumed that since this is a business, it is subject to laws similar to the United States protecting consumers. This is not so.
My gf and I decided to meet for the first time in Kiev. A few weeks or so before my visit, her cell phone went out. I could not go to Kiev to meet her and not have a means to contact her with. Against the advice that we always read, I sent her some money. For her train fare and a day or two's accomodations, I sent her some more money a week before I left for Kiev. It turned out that she was very honest. She gave me proper accounting of her expenditures when I got there.
The agency was another story. I used Moneygram. Among other things, Moneygram needs a number code from the recepient to get the money. Since my gf had no phone and no internet, the website was my only means to give her the number code. Edem Club saw to it that they got 10% of the money I sent her. I complained to Army of Brides, the website that the agency used, but Army of Brides denies getting any of the money and they wanted proof to do anything about it. I think I finally convinced my gf that the practice is crooked, but back then, she did not think anything was wrong with it. Her response was without the agency, we would not have met. That is probably what the agency led her to believe that she must give the 10%.
That was just the beginning. I wanted to keep my accomodations in Kiev at $100 a day or less. Looking at the internet for hotels, that would be no problem except for the reservation fee. For some reason, Ukraine hotels charge a reservation fee of up to 50%. There was no way I would pay that. There are plenty of hotels. It was November. I hear even if it was summer, there would be plenty of room. Edem Club convinced my gf that $120 a day for their apartment was a bargain. When my gf called the hotels, they included the reservation fee, so she agreed with them. I knew because the fees were broken down on the internet. I almost did not meet my gf because of this. I took my time to answer her. When she wrote back, Edem Club lowered their apartment fee to $100 per day. I still frowned on that, but I accepted it.
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sickofscammers
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Registered: 04-18-2009
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posted on 05-16-2009 at 00:14 |
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Agencies good or bad?
Ragingbull,
I have been told by a western person now living in Ukraine, that most of the problems come from local agencies that are American owned but operated by local people.
Local people earning more money at an agency then on the 8-5 job.
The person says that most of the time the woman is more interested in corresponding to you then meeting you, but as part of the rules of joining the agency, she must make herself available to the client.
The person goes on to say that a dishonest woman will find reasons why she cannot see you for days while you are in her city and then It's for a short amount of time.
Also that, most of the time, It's the interpreter that is writing you and not the the woman who you think.
I received a private email from the interpreter that i had with all my dates with one woman and when i was reading the email, i went numb. Because i could not tell the difference between the correspondence from the woman that i had been writing to and the interpreters private email letter..Everything was worded exactly the same, even down to the placing of the emoticons ;)
But i had a feeling that i had been scammed before i left Ukraine, this private email that i received, added to confirming it.
I have read on another topic that Natasha Club is a huge scam agency, but it seems that all these FSU agencies all share the same data bases and work together in a system called, Partner Programming.
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ragingbull
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Registered: 05-14-2009
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posted on 05-16-2009 at 00:41 |
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Agencies
Someone who thinks he is communicating with my gf is probably communicating with the interpreter. How is that rule going to be followed if this man wants to meet? I remember communicating with a lady in Zaporozhye for a few months. I sent her a Christmas gift, even. She did not want to meet in February. She said it was too soon. When I asked her if it was really too soon, or is it I was too old. She said I was too old. I was not too old to communicate with for two months. A normal lady, wanting to get married would not wait another several months. Nothing made sense except I was not communicating with her, but an interpreter.
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sickofscammers
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Registered: 04-18-2009
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posted on 05-16-2009 at 01:34 |
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Agencies good or bad?
I have also seen of the internet via 'the stan jensen report', that agencies place advertisments in local newspapers wanting women to 'man' the computers..
I remember a English speaking guide ( who has nothing to do with marriage agencies) tell me that she was approached to join an agency to write love letters to men.In other words, not to interpret letters, but she was the behind the letters, not the face on the profile.
50 letters per day with commission, this is why the agency people can look you in the eye and say that they don't pay the women, but what they won't say is, It's the interpreter who pays the 'face' on the profile...
True.
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beentheredonethat
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Registered: 06-06-2009
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posted on 06-06-2009 at 17:26 |
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BrentBurnedInCA is totally correct
I have had several long term relationship experiences, the last one to a Russian woman. What I figure from this experience is this:
1) People lie to each other to get what they want
2) Life/relationships is one big game. Be nice to a woman you get creamed, be nice to a man (from womans point of view), you get used.
3) Most native/native marriages that don't involve children fail and many that do, also fail.
4) A woman who lives in a country where women have little rights, few men who want a decent family life and where there is little stability, it is a no brainer that men offering a more secure way of life are attractive to Russian women.
So, I would say 99% of Russian womens' main aim is to have a better life when it comes to relationships with western men and not because you are the love they always desired. They are using you.
However, I think there are a small minority that are genuine.
My Russian woman tried to blackmail me into getting her green card
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RussianWoman
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Registered: 06-24-2009
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posted on 06-24-2009 at 07:10 |
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about beentheredonethat post
hey everyone!
You guys are so funny here so I just can't pass by.
"1) People lie to each other to get what they want"
Oh God, those are the words of wisdom! lolol have you just realised that?
"4) A woman who lives in a country where women have little rights, few men who want a decent
family life and where there is little stability, it is a no brainer that men offering a more secure way of life are attractive to Russian women."
Lol do you really believe that women have little rights in Russia? Aren't they allowed to vote? Don't they get 50% of his property if they get divorced? Or isn't it like they get 33% of his wage if they have one child and 50% if they have more than one. Aren't there many directors and politicians who are women. What rights are you talking about? You seem like you don't know what you are talking about.
"So, I would say 99% of Russian womens' main aim is to have a better life when it comes to relationships with western men and not because you are the love they always desired."
Lol@"you are the love they always desired." Like an old ugly farter or what? Nah, do you really believe that?
"They are using you."
Yay! The only intelligent phrase here! Yeah, right, you are being used, but not only by Russian women. There might very well be a guy behind the messages sent or just a scammer. You think 99% of Russian women are scammers, that's not true, the truth is that 99% of Russian women are disgusted with an old fugly guy trying to buy and ship a wife oversees and the only ones you get to know are scammers.
The simplest way to avoid a scammer is to stop sending implicitly horny messages to 20 year old model looking girls and try to find someone of your age. No scammer would use a picture of a 40 year old woman, as well as no 20 year old girl would be attracted by a picture of an average 40 year old man. That's obvious as hell.
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ragingbull
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Registered: 05-14-2009
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posted on 06-24-2009 at 19:23 |
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the love they always desired
Lol@"you are the love they always desired." Like an old ugly farter or what? Nah, do you really believe that?
Russian Woman, you didn't see that the statement started with "not because".
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MasonBurkhalter
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Registered: 08-20-2009
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posted on 08-21-2009 at 16:53 |
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I'm with RussianWoman on this one...
I am with Russian Woman on this one, I personally feel that if you get scammed by a woman you A. don't know what to look out for (understandable) or B. Your intentions are less than genuine. If you are a 45 to 80 year-old man and your looking for a model quality 20 year old you are destined to get royally skrewed and honestly if B is more your situation than maybe you would be better off going through an escort service.
I recently wrote an article about how to go about finding a foreign woman step by step. I'll post it below. If you follow this guideline verbatum regardless of what you think will work best for you I can 99.9% guarantee this will work every time.
Most men are not realistic, they have less than genuine intentions, or they are just plain dumb. This is the main reason scammers in this industry exist IMHO. Statements that generalize all Russian women as scammers or of having lesser morals are just ignorant and rude.
ADVICE WHEN JOINING AN AGENCY
There are many different ways you can go about finding a foreign bride. Different things work for different people but if you are considering joining an agency for introductions or tours here is a little advice that will prove to be very useful to you.
1. Always do your research on the company before joining their service: The biggest issues with most agencies are their legitimacy in this industry. It is extremely crucial to find out who provides the best service before you decide to travel. Make sure that you check the company out on the Better Business Bureau and other companies such as ripoffreport.com. This will give you a great idea as to the track record of success with any business your doing research on. Another way to get well informed on an IMA (International Marriage Agency) would be to check out the company in question’s testimonials or reference page. If the company you are researching has virtually no references or testimonials this most likely is a major reflection on the business practices performed by the agency you are checking out.
2. Be Realistic: Now that you know what agency you want to do business with there are many things you should start doing to prepare yourself for your future trip. First and foremost would be to write a list of everything your looking for in your future bride. BE REALISTIC! The average man that fails in this very diverse industry falls in “lust” not love. Make sure that your search criteria for women stays within about 20 years of your own age at the very most. The majority of the men who look into this make a huge mistake by dating women considerably younger than they are. Sometimes you may have success, but if you are an older man and your looking for a woman with a 20 age difference you have to be realistic of what her intentions might be at that point and you might also want to re-evaluate your own intentions as well. Ask yourself; are you looking to have a good time and that’s it, or do you want to actually find a meaningful relationship with a genuine, good hearted, marriage minded woman. Typically the age difference comes into play later on down the road after you have already invested much time, effort, and money into this. Don’t set yourself up for heartbreak a couple years down the road. Be realistic.
3. Figure out where you want to travel: The average of people who actually make the choice to travel with an IMA is miniscule. This is a good and bad thing. Its good because the approximate 3% of people who actually do go on a Singles Tour have a HUGE variety of potential marriage candidates when they get to the country their interested in. It is also a good thing because for the women the service is typically free if it’s coming from a legitimate IMA. What this means for you is that your opportunity of meeting as many women as you need to find what your looking for is much more doable. The negative aspect of this is that most men will never know what they are missing out on, and most of these women will spend years on an IMA site and may never get the opportunity to find a good husband. With this being said look at your schedule, plan a date that works best for you according to when tours are being held, and book a reservation. Now you can start thinking of WHEN you will be going and not IF. This is a huge step that separates the men who are serious from the men who are interested but will never go and will never know what they are missing.
4. Correspondence: Once you have figured out where you want to travel, go to the IMA website and start looking for women to write to within the area you will be visiting. Correspondence for some people is key. For others it isn’t necessary at all. Your letter or email to the woman should be genuine. You should mention your intentions of traveling to her country on a set date, and you should also include a picture of yourself. Try briefly mentioning a few things about yourself but don’t get into too much detail. Because most men don’t actually do a tour or personal introduction there are a multitude of men on the Internet that simply write women just to be pen pals. In the industry they are referred to as “Keyboard Romeos”. That being said, it is crucial that you stand out above the rest of the men who don’t even intend to meet these women as most of the women receive an exhausting amount of letters and emails. If you aren’t able to get any good quality correspondence going don’t worry, most people don’t start corresponding until after they have met a woman in person and know for a fact that they have good chemistry. A Singles Tour held by an IMA will get rid of a lot of guesswork as you will have the opportunity to date many women during your trip.
5. Keep your options open: One of the biggest mistakes that most men make on a Singles Tour is that they don’t keep their options open. When you meet that special someone and the sparks really fly it will be easy to forget about the Socials and other ways that you can meet more women, such as more personal introductions. Don’t let this happen to you. As amazing as your potential bride to be may seem, many men have dropped out of all of the activities provided for the duration of the tour so that they can exclusively date the girl they think might be THE ONE. If you do this you are opening yourself up to the possibility of it not working out and at that point you will have wasted your opportunity to really meet the right one. Always keep your options open. If you are upfront and honest about how serious you are with your search, most women will respect your decision.
6. Fiancée Visa: Once you have met the girl you want to invest more time and effort into dating exclusively you can choose to fill out a Fiancée Visa. Some men will start filling the K-1 Visa out by the end of their first trip. Others may want to get to know the woman more through correspondence before deciding to start doing the paperwork. Whichever way you go about doing it the choice is yours. Personally I feel that after you have met someone and have had the ability to get to know her pretty well your best bet would be to start corresponding with her exclusively for a while before you decide to go through all of the paperwork. If you have the means available it would also be advantageous to visit again on your own with the intentions of dating her more exclusively. Once you decide that you want to start filling out the K-1 Visa you should keep a couple things into consideration. First it takes about six to seven months to process a Fiancée Visa. Secondly, immigration laws will require that you have proof that you and your future wife have spent time together in her country. Make sure to take plenty of pictures of you two together while you’re over there if you have good chemistry. While the paperwork is being processed there will be a few things that your fiancée will need to pay for on her end. She will need to do a physical exam and also an interview with the US Embassy in her country. It would be a wise decision for you to cover these costs for her but NEVER SEND MONEY TO SOMEONE YOU HAVEN’T MET! Like I said previously you have to prove you have been with her so if a woman you have corresponded with says that she needs you to help her with the cost of obtaining a visa and you haven’t met her in person DON’T SEND HER MONEY. She is certainly a scammer. It is extremely difficult for someone from a different country to get a normal visa to the US and because of this the chances of the woman lying to you are so great it’s just not worth the risk.
7. While you wait, keep your relationship alive: If you have ever been involved in a long term relationship then I’m sure you already know that it can be very hard work. It is important during the K-1 Visa process that you keep your relationship alive with your future bride. Try buying her a cell phone with a good international plan so that you can talk on the phone. Try and send her an email or text message at least once a day. Make sure that if you have a scheduled time to talk with her on the phone you don’t miss it. Most International Marriage Agencies also provide online English classes that you can purchase for your bride to be. A big way you will be able to tell if she is right for you will be her willingness to learn your language. You might also want to start taking initiative in learning her language as well. All of these things are key in keeping your relationship with your foreign bride alive.
8. Go get her: While some men have not done this and still been successful it is in my personal experience it is very advantageous for you to go to your fiancée’s country and escort her to the US. You have to remember that this is going to be one of the biggest decisions of her life. Picking her up and escorting her back to the US not only shows some initiative on your own part but it also provides her the support she will need to make this courageous leap for you. Remember that she is leaving behind everything that she knows and she might give you a mixture of emotions that should not be misconstrued. Mainly she will feel excited, nervous, and overwhelmed. Make sure to be receptive to her feelings and do what you can to be by her side no matter what.
9. The 90-day trial period: Before you and your fiancée decide to completely tie the knot make sure that you have all of your bases covered. Keep in mind that you are her only source of support when she first arrives so you will want to make sure to be by her side every step of the way. Help her meet your family and also people you are friends with. Make sure when you introduce her to the people of importance in your life that you include her in your conversations and make her feel welcome. Ask her what she would like to make herself feel more comfortable and welcome, and try to make it happen for her. Include her in your life as much as possible for the first couple of months at least so that you can truly decide if marriage is the right option for you.
10. Tie the Knot: Make sure that when you pop the question you do it the right way. Be romantic and thoughtful. Tell her how much she means to you. If you follow these steps you will have a much better opportunity of finding success in this industry than you would doing it another way.
Most of the men on these different forums in regards to dating internationally would recommend you keep an agency out of the equation and try and do it yourself. The decision is yours to make. Some things work differently for different people but honestly if you want someone to help you every step of the way an agency is the best option in my personal opinion. Make sure to do research. Most people in this industry are very passionate about how they feel you should go about doing this. Keeping in mind there are many ways to go about this, get hard facts before you allow yourself to be swayed in any direction.
The purpose of this article is to allow those of you who are considering international dating to know all of the options that are available to you. If the idea of traveling with a group of men to meet a whole lot of women does not sound of interest to you for whatever reason keep in mind that most International Marriage Agencies also provide personal introduction services and utilizing an agencies services eliminates not only the guesswork but also the trial by error that you most likely will be faced with in doing this on your own.
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LetsKeepItReal
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Registered: 01-11-2010
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posted on 01-11-2010 at 19:42 |
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wow.... men still buy their wifes...
When you guys will get real....???
Do you hope find love via catalogues and agencies?
No matter how wonderful you might be on one side…. and warm hearted loving your potential brides on the other hand…. It’s not necessary a key for lasting relationship….
Happy Russian/American couple is not much different from American happy couple!!!
Similar temperament, chemistry, level of intelligence, sexuality, life values, goals and expectations…..and million other trivial things…. Can you find it via agency? Believe me….. language barrier is not going to be a positive factor either….
Please….. Don’t waste your money and have unreasonable expectations…
Buy a puppy if you are lonely….. Read a book…. Run a mile…. Go to the gym…. Be a volunteer in a dog shelter…. Take a trip…. Call your mother…..Please, don’t buy a wife!
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